


Russian Demons

by smolgreeneyedavenger



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Civil War Team Captain America, F/M, Oneshot, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Pre Black Widow (Movie), romanogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-24 08:58:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21335626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolgreeneyedavenger/pseuds/smolgreeneyedavenger
Summary: "It got quiet for a moment before Natasha leaned over, pressing her elbows on her knees. “I need to leave.” Steve didn’t stop the cleaning but he did frown down at her. She stared back at him, nodding forcefully. “I think I need to go to Budapest.”"
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 7
Kudos: 84





	Russian Demons

**Author's Note:**

> So the Black Widow movie will be coming out in May. I cannot believe my queen is finally getting her own movie. It’s been a long time coming. Anyway, so far so good, it’s being set between Civil War and Infinity War. And I don’t understand how they will do that without at least mentioning Steven Grant Rogers. Okay, am I right?? Anyway, the point I am making is that yeah, she’ll be in Budapest and Steve probably won’t be around but she would’ve had to leave Team Cap which is on the run since Civil War. No more chatting— here is my little one-shot.

_“Sloppy. Failing on purpose.”_ Russian demons.

_“Sister?”_ Her voice is so young and innocent.

_“I have no place in the world.”_ The fear crawls.

_“Natasha… look at me.”_ Steve’s hands cupping her face.

Memories climbed over memories, sensations beat against sensations. She felt it all aching her brain and tightening her chest is some kind of anxiety. Sweat trickled down her forehead and danced along her eyebrow. It jolted Natasha up into a sitting position and a gasping breath for air. She swatted away at her head, pressed her hand against the cheek where she had felt Steve’s rough thumb stroking against her cheekbone. It had felt real.

The Russian demon’s voice still sounded too close, breathing down threats and horrors. Natasha suddenly rubbed at her wrist where she had been handcuffed for so long in the Red Room. The nightmares were chasing her… again?

And that young voice? It was the worst. It caused Natasha’s gut to squeeze. She had heard one bit of news, one memory probed in her mind, one picture found its way on her computer screen. It was enough to give nightmares and make plans.

Natasha looked around the room, remembering her situation. It was dark in the small motel room, the cold night wind blowing through the opened window a few feet away from her. The curtains floated against the bed where Wanda slept seemingly content. Natasha had taken the couch, a flimsy blanket and a small pillow. Wanda deserved the comfort and the undisturbed sleep. Even though had been two months since Natasha had helped break Wanda out of the RAFT, she still seemed to be recovering.

Natasha pulled the blanket off but shivered when the wind seemed to immediately hit her. She grabbed the nearest sweatshirt and pulled it over her head, flipping her curls out of the collar. Even though it was chilly, Ireland had proved to be a safe and quiet place for the team to settle and Natasha had to admit she was going to miss it.

She moved slowly across the bedroom to the door, watching Wanda as she went. She was a light sleeper, Natasha really didn’t want to wake her. She made it through the door and out intothe hall, without seeing one stir from the girl. Natasha immediately frowned when she stood in the dark hallway, listening to the small chatter of a tv somewhere. She stood up to the other bedroom, where Steve and Sam were staying, backing away after only hearing small snores from behind the door. She pulled the bottom of her sleeves, squeezing them in her palms as she walked down the hall, making her way for the kitchen.

The tv noise was coming from the living area and Natasha couldn’t help a sad smile when she saw Steve on the couch, his hands busy with something but his eyes intent on the screen. She often saw him watching the tv or reading the news of any bit of crime or tragedy. It wasn’t like he could help any bit of it. He couldn’t be Captain America. She knew it hurt him… so why did he watch? She sighed loud enough for him to hear as she made her way to the pantry. “You don’t have to watch it, you know.”

“Easier said than done…” he replied, dropping his head to look down at his work in his lap. “For some reason.” Natasha grabbed a peppermint tea bag from the pantry before filling the tea kettle with water. “Did I wake you?”

“Oh, no.” She put the kettle on the burner— an old looking burner, stained with bacon grease and dust. She found a mug and slipped her tea bag in as she walked over to him. “I was, uh. Well…” _Running from ghosts? Making plans?_ She came around to the couch, pulling a pillow from the arm and settling in the ugly but comfy cushions. “I couldn’t sleep.”

He looked at her, his eyes a bit squinted as he studied her. His beard was coming nicely and his hair was starting to stick up in some places. Being on the run was doing good things for him in that department. She thought it was cute. “Nightmares?” he asked.

She glared, forgetting his cute hair and remembering why she was up. “If you think I’m gonna be confessing right now, you’re wrong.” He just smiled, looking back at his work. His work— her work. She frowned as she leaned over to him. “Are you cleaning my guns?”

He shrugged, rubbing the smooth top of her Glock. “They looked like they needed attention.” She smiled at his work and pulled some hair behind her ear. She watched him diligently open each crevice of her weapon, rubbing and wetting with the gun cleaner on a different cloth. She would occasionally lean over, pointing out a spot he missed until she had to admit he was pretty good at the job. She usually didn’t like anyone to take care of the weapons but her, but he was proving himself worthy. And probably only because he had watched her do it a dozen times.

It got quiet for a moment before Natasha leaned over, pressing her elbows on her knees. “I need to leave.” Steve didn’t stop the cleaning but he did frown down at her. She stared back at him, nodding forcefully. “I think I need to go to Budapest.”

His frown got deeper and he grabbed the magazine of the gun, locking it back into place. He was still steadily working… but he was thinking deeply. “Because…?”

She glanced at the television but didn’t pay attention to it. It was just a way to just keep from any eye contact with him. “Because of my past.” Steve stopped cleaning the gun for once and got quiet. It prompted her to look up at him which she regretted when she looked back at those baby blue eyes searching hers intently. The whistle of the kettle was her break and she jumped off the couch to grab it before it started to scream. She didn’t want to wake Sam or Wanda. She needed to talk to Steve alone. Ugh! She couldn’t even look him in the eye properly. She poured the boiling water into her mug, froth coming from her tea bag as it spun to the top. She looked back into the living room, seeing Steve settle against the back of the couch. It looked like he had a leg propped up on the couch now. She came back with her tea, steam following behind her.

She just set the mug on the table beside the cleaning supplies and curled back into the cushions. She turned to face him, bringing her legs against her chest. He put an arm on the back of the couch to look straight at her. “What’s going on?”

“I gained some intel of someone I knew long ago. They’re tracking their way to Hungary. I know their purpose. I need to be there.” She hugged herself and shook her head, looking back at the steam from her mug. “I just wanted to let you know what’s going on with me before I took off.” She leaned over, grabbing her mug and bringing it to her lips. She would leave before Sam and Wanda were awake. Only Steve would understand why she needed to break away.

She found him frowning when she looked over the rim of her mug. “You take off? You want to go alone?” Natasha’s mind did a backtrack. But of course she would go _alone_. She thought Steve would understand without any explanation. He should. He knew her and her past well enough. He knew she sometimes had to take care of things herself.

She cocked her head. “I _need_ to do this alone.” She pulled one of her knees closer to herself and stared at the odd design of the carpet beneath them. “I do not want to drag you into all this.” She sighed heavily, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment.

His big hand dropped on her knee and he rubbed it, affectionately. “You know I don’t mind being dragged…” She smiled up at him and kicked his hand off her knee. He looked back at her guns. “You wanna tell me anything about this intel you found?”

She drank from her tea again, glancing up the tv. The reporter stood in the rain, keeping her coat hood tight over her head. Her Irish accent was thick as she reported wet weather for the rest of the week. Ireland was just a wet place. Budapest would be a crowded place. Easy for a Red Room agent to slip in and out, eating street food like a normal citizen, following museum tours. All the while, catching the eye of every man and keeping guns hidden on thigh holsters. Yelena would be no exception. “No,” she finally answered, glancing back at him. He cocked his head and sighed, looking slightly irritated. “Maybe when I get back.” She set her mug back on the table and dropped her feet back to the ground. “Trust me on this.”

“Natasha—”

She started making her way around the couch, squeezing the cuffs of her sleeves again. “I’ll be out of here before the morning. The sooner I’m out of here—“ She turned, not completely surprised when she felt his fingers grip around her wrist. She allowed him to pull her back to the couch though she wasn’t exactly sure why. Maybe she wanted him to be okay with all this.

“Natasha.” He sat on his knees now, leaning his front against the back of the couch. He pulled her closer to him, squeezing her fingers now. “You don’t have to do this.” She didn’t look at him. She allowed her other hand to the one he gripped, picking at a loose thread of her sleeve. He sighed and Natasha felt it on her hair, sending a few goosebumps down her arms. “Look, we may not exactly be the Avengers here…” Natasha looked up at him, seeing the same hurt and regret she had in his face. He smiled all the same. “But we are a team. And we are a family…” He didn’t hesitate when he pulled some hair from her face. “You don’t have to do any of this alone, Nat.”

Natasha stared up at him for a long moment letting out a soft chuckle. “I know.” She leaned into his hand that still held her hair. She softly gripped his hand with both her own and pressed a small kiss into his wrist. “But I need to.” She set it down and took a step back.

She saw the streak of annoyance and sadness reach across his face. He pressed his front against the couch, glancing out the small window across the room. Voices from the tv seemed muffled as Natasha watched him so carefully. There was acceptance on his face when he looked back. “I’m not gonna convince you of anything, hmm.” Natasha just shook her head. He let out an identical chuckle as she had done and stood up straighter. “When you heading out?”

“Before dawn.” He was nodding when she glanced back up. “You’ll let Wanda and Sam know?”

“You won’t tell them yourself?” He frowned, making guilt swirl in her stomach. Somehow, he was able to do that with just a stare. She knew what he was thinking, even though he would deny it a thousand times if she voiced it. She was thinking the same. Their team— or whatever you wanted to call it— were on the run. They hadn’t sighed the Accords and Natasha had turned against it. She had been leading ever since busting them out of the RAFT. She was a secret agent who had gone rogue before. She knew how to become a ghost, she had all the best hideouts, she knew all the secrets. For the last few months she’s been training them to do it on their own. And now she was abandoning them.

But if she didn’t leave now to take care of Yelena… worse things could happen for them. Steve didn’t understand that. He would one day.

She folded her arms over her chest and stared back at him, a smirk on her face. “One of you idiots may convince me to stay around if I wait any longer.” He couldn’t help the smile and she knew it. He softly punched the couch as he let his eyes drag away from hers.

“Only because those idiots love you.” He stared at her again. He was letting her leave. Or better said, accepting her leave. He wasn’t going to fight her.

She took a step closer to the couch, suddenly feeling better about the whole situation. She stared straight back into his eyes, allowing a moment for them to study each other. Some sirens from the tv jolted him from the stare and he finally dropped his head. She squeezed his hand that was pressed in the couch and let the other to ruffle some of his hair. “Thanks, Steve. Really…” She pressed a hand against his cheek and nodded, bobbing her curls against her shoulders. “I couldn’t do this without you.”

He gave her almost a sympathetic smile and pulled away, finally standing back on his two feet. “Well, when you get ready to tell me what the heck this is, I’ll say you’re welcome.” He laughed and she let out an annoyed chuckle. He turned off the tv with some button from the remote and then made his way around the couch, snatching up her tea. Natasha thanked him as she took the mug from him and wrapped her sweater tighter around her middle. He reached over, switching off any lamps. “So… about us?”

She nodded, grabbing his hand before he could act so professional. The team needed to be taken care of. Steve had seemed to master the tricks of being a fugitive and she was now certain he could handle himself. He softened at her touch and didn’t mind ridding the distance between them. He pulled his arm around her shoulder, still cuddling her hand in his. “Stay close to the ground. Keep moving, though. More hideouts will come along the way. But if you find yourself desperate… no problem calling me up.”

“Really?” he asked, lifting an eyebrow and quizzically watching her. “Only call me for emergencies, you butt.” He hummed an understanding before grinning at her. She jabbed him in the ribs before sipping from her tea. “And, hey…” She pulled out of his grasp and stared up at him intently. “I’m not abandoning you. I’ll be back.” He frowned, looking a bit concerned. She sighed, looking down into her tea. “It’s just… the Avengers have split… you’re a fugitive… and now I’m…”

He pressed his fingers against her lips and shook his head. “Hey, you don’t have to do this. Took years to understand you and I haven’t forgotten. I know you need to do this. And I know why you need to do it alone—no matter how much that annoys me.” He tapped her nose, playfully. “Don’t worry about me, Nat.”

He was gonna be okay.

Natasha smiled and handed him her mug. “Goodnight, you.” She cupped his face, pressing a kiss to his cheek. She muttered a small “love you” before letting him go and turning back to the hallway. She turned back once to see him drinking the rest of her tea and bringing the mug to the sink. “Yelena Belova.” He glanced up at her and she nodded. “A bit of the intel I had. You won’t find anything on her. But, uh… well.” She smirked. “I’ll tell you when I get back, hmm?” He frowned but nodded, thoughtfully. “Take care of yourself,” she added, stepping back in the hall.

“You too, Nat.”

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading! sending so many hugs to you!


End file.
